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Except in the case of public figures who are the subjects of satire, the names of entities and persons referred to in SP articles are completely fictitious, and any resemblance to real entities or persons, either living or dead, is purely coincidental.

The quotations and opinions attributed to public figures in SP articles have been invented for strictly satiric purposes, and do not necessarily reflect the thoughts, opinions, or beliefs of the persons or entities to whom they are attributed.

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Those most likely to be offended include politicians, celebrities, and those who expect satiric writing to adhere to the rules of political correctness.
 
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Articles by Subject

  Politics Entertainment Sports

Business & Technology

Lifestyle & Miscellaneous

Editorials

Politics

Dubya

Bush in Fahrenheit 9/11: A Star is Born
(2004-07-05, QED)

Bush Set to Star in New Reality Show: The Gambler in Chief
(2004-04-26, QED)

Bush Proposes Constitutional Ban on Reality Television
(2004-03-29, QED)

Deconstructing Dubya: Revisiting the State of the Union Address
(2004-02-02, QED)

Bush Vows to Terminate Terrorist Threat
(2003-07-21, QED)

Bush Prints More Money to Finance Tax Cut
(2004-05-12, QED)

Bush Calls Off War Due To Jedi Mind Trick
(2004-04-14, QED)

Bush, Blair to Iraqi People: We Won't Let You Down This Time, We Promise
(2003-03-31, AMFM)

» top

American Politics

Pentagon, White House Rocked by Muppet Prisoner Abuse Scandal
(2004-05-24, QED)

New Health Threat Has Americans Hopping Mad and Running Scared
(2004-01-05, QED)

Gov. Schwarzenegger Renames State "Cow-lee-phone-yaw"
(2003-11-24, QED)

Gov. Schwarzenegger to Terminate Deficit by Making More Movies
(2003-10-27, QED)

Schwarzenegger Chooses Celebrity Cabinet
(2003-08-18, QED)

Pentagon Releases 'Shock and Awe' Video Game
(2003-04-28, QED)

U.S. Cities Named Bagdad Under Siege
(2003-04-14, QED)

"Private" Clinton Summoned for Military Service
(2003-04-14, QED)

Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas Breaks 12-Year Silence
(2003-04-14, QED)

Rest of World to Vote in Next U.S. Presidential Election
(2003-03-31, AMFM)

Senators to Press Own Children to Join U.S. Forces in Iraq
(2003-03-31, AMFM)

Orange Alert Measures in Place at Nation's Tanning Parlours
(2003-03-31, AMFM)

U.S. Govt. Actions Too Easy to Satirize: World Satirists' Union
(2003-04-28, AMFM)

O.J. to Join Search for Iraqi Weapons
(2003-05-12, AMFM)

Pentagon Unleashes War on War; Wars on Famine, Pestilence, Death to Follow
(2003-06-09, AMFM)

Oscar 5-Second Delay To Shield Public From Nudity, Profanity", Not Political Statements
(2004-03-01, AMFM)

WMD Found in Rumsfeld’s Garage
(2003-06-09, MIA)

Senate to Review Terrorist Links to Easter Bunny
(2003-06-23, MIA)

» top

Canadian Politics

From AdScam to CokeScam: Paul Martin in Trouble Again
(2004-07-05, QED)

The Dark Side of the Man: Exposing Harper's Hidden Agenda
(2004-07-05, QED)

Liberal Party of Canada Changes Name to Maple Leafs
(2004-06-21, QED)

Rap Sensation M.P. Broadbent's Latest Oration is Sweeping the Nation
(2004-06-21, QED)

Marijuana Party Riding High and Looking to Smoke the Competition
(2004-06-07, QED)

Kim Campbell Protests Exclusion from Time Magazine's List of Most Influential People
(2004-04-26, QED)

New National Registries That We Actually Need
(2004-04-12, QED)

Close Encounters of the Prime Ministerial Kind
(2004-04-12, QED)

Conan O'Brien Also Offended English Canadians with Silly Stereotypes
(2004-03-01, QED)

Adrienne Clarkson Presents: The Couch Boy Cometh
(2004-01-19, QED)

Ontario Premier Declares Fire Sale on Crown Assets to Balance Budget
(2003-11-10, QED)

Blackout 2003: Another Black Eye for Ontario
(2003-09-01, QED)

Canadian Prime Minister Opposes Free Rolling Stones Concert
(2003-06-09, QED)

SARS Quarantine Widens to Include Everyone in Toronto and Taiwan
(2003-04-28, QED)

Ont. Govt. Unveils Modest Proposal to End Homelessness
(2003-04-14, QED)

Canada Declares Independence
(2003-04-28, AMFM)

Dust Masks No Help Against SARS, but Prevent Cooties
(2003-04-28, AMFM)

Man Evicted, SARS-Quarantined in Bus Shelter
(2003-04-28, AMFM)

London, Paris Welcome Toronto to League of World Class Cities
(2003-05-12, AMFM)

Ontario NDP Mole Planned Tory Made-for-TV Budget, “Tory Indy”
(2003-05-12, AMFM)

Ontario Gov't Propaganda Includes Postage-paid Reader Reply Forms, Giving Voters Way to Vent
(2003-06-09, AMFM)

SARS Stones Concert Boost to T.O. Image, Economy to Compensate for Concert's Damage to T.O. Image, Economy
(2003-07-21, AMFM)

Monthly Blackouts to be Mandated as Means of Getting Citizens' Lazy Asses Off Couches
(2003-09-01, AMFM)

Ontario Grits to Give Tories ‘Sporting Chance’
(2003-09-15, AMFM)

GTA Chinese, Vietnamese Restaurant Owners Deny Catering to Neo-Nazi Extremists
(2003-11-10, AMFM)

Report: Toronto Narrowly Avoided Disaster During Blackout; People Pretty Much Don't Care and Continue Wanton Use of Electricity
(2004-01-05, AMFM)

GO Transit Designers Surprised to Learn of Toronto Snowfall, Sub-Zero Temperatures
(2004-02-02, AMFM)

Liberal Sponsorship Scandal: 90% of Canadians Unsure What All the Fuss is About
(2004-02-16, AMFM)

Letter to the Editor: Solomon Grundy and Alphonso Gagliano: Separated at Birth?
(2004-04-26, The Ultra-Humanite)

Former Thai Dictator Offers Words of Wisdom to Canadians
(2004-07-05, The Ultra-Humanite)

» top

World Politics

Saddam Hussein Caught Red-Handed in Santa Suit
(2003-12-22, QED)

Ugandan Dictator Idi Amin Remembered Fondly During Memorial Service
(2003-09-15, QED)

Nike Signs Liberian President "Chuck" Taylor to Lucrative Endorsement Deal
(2003-07-21, QED)

France Takes Back Statue of Liberty
(2003-06-09, QED)

Leaflets Dropped in Baghdad, Old Europe Claim Independent Thought Not Dead in U.S.
(2003-03-31, AMFM)

Tourists Encourage U.S. War on Syria
(2003-05-12, AMFM)

U.S., Israeli, Palestinian Leaders’ Wives: Husbands Refuse to Ask Directions, Insist on Relying on Map
(2003-06-23, AMFM)

Rogue States Rush to Acquire WMD, McDonald’s
(2003-07-07, AMFM)

People Magazine Names Kim Jong Il ‘Sexiest Man Alive’
(2003-07-07, MIA)

» top

Entertainment

Film

Dubya in Fahrenheit 9/11: A Star is Born
(2004-07-05, QED)

Peter Jackson's Oscars Revoked After Shocking Revelation: He's a Hobbit!
(2004-03-29, QED)

Todd Bertuzzi's Tearful Confession: The Passion of the Christ Made Me Do It!
(2004-03-15, QED)

Coming Attractions: "The Passion of the Christ: The Second Coming"
(2004-03-15, QED)

Movie Review: The Barbarian Invasions (Les Invasions Barbares)
(2004-03-01, QED)

Gov. Schwarzenegger to Terminate Deficit by Making More Movies
(2003-10-27, QED)

Kate Hudson Opposes Occupation of Iraq by Naming Child Uday Hussein
(2003-09-15, QED)

Schwarzenegger Chooses Celebrity Cabinet
(2003-08-18, QED)

Christopher Reeve Goes to Israel to Star in Robocop Sequel
(2003-08-18, QED)

Seabiscuit Sex Scene Cut
(2003-07-21, QED)

Star Wars Fans Hail Return of the Wookiee
(2003-05-12, QED)

Deceased Actor Jeter Upstaged Again By Yankee Shortstop
(2003-04-28, QED)

Oscar 5-Second Delay To Shield Public From Nudity, Profanity", Not Political Statements
(2004-03-01, AMFM)

» top

Television

Dubya Set to Star in New Reality Show: The Gambler in Chief
(2004-04-26, QED)

Bush Proposes Constitutional Ban on Reality Television
(2004-03-29, QED)

Coming Soon to CBC: Bertuzzi's Inquest
(2004-03-15, QED)

Conan O'Brien Also Offended English Canadians with Silly Stereotypes
(2004-03-01, QED)

The Grapes of Wrath: Don Cherry Leaves Hockey Night in Canada for Crossfire
(2004-02-16, QED)

Has He Lost His Mind?: Frasier's Iron Man Streak to Continue
(2004-02-02, QED)

Adrienne Clarkson Presents: The Couch Boy Cometh
(2003-01-19, QED)

Prime Time Comedies Get Serious After Ritter's Death
(2003-09-29, QED)

Ed the Sock's Secret Identity Revealed
(2003-07-07, QED)

Celebrity Prison, Celebrity Sanitation Workers Highlight Fall Schedule
(2003-05-12, QED)

War Kills Prime-Time Programming
(2003-04-14, QED)

Oscar 5-Second Delay To Shield Public From Nudity, Profanity", Not Political Statements
(2004-03-01, AMFM)

» top

Music

Rap Sensation M.P. Broadbent's Latest Oration is Sweeping the Nation
(2004-06-21, QED)

Family, Friends and Fans Back Wacko Jacko, Convinced of His Innocence
(2003-12-08, QED)

Cher, Madonna, Stephen Hawking Form Musical Super Group
(2003-06-23, QED)

RIAA President Snitches on Own Grandmother for Swapping MP3s
(2003-05-12, AMFM)

Fan: "Say wha'? They didn't pick AMFM to be the new VJ?! Punk-ass muthafuhkas!"
(2004-01-19, AMFM)

» top

Comics

AMFM: the Adventures of Quincy K. Xavier

Wingding Art
(2003-11-24, AMFM)

» top

Sports

Liberal Party of Canada Changes Name to Maple Leafs
(2004-06-21, QED)

Todd Bertuzzi's Tearful Confession: The Passion of the Christ Made Me Do It!
(2004-03-15, QED)

Coming Soon to CBC: Bertuzzi's Inquest
(2004-03-15, QED)

The Grapes of Wrath: Don Cherry Leaves Hockey Night in Canada for CNN's Crossfire
(2004-02-16, QED)

Ben Johnson vs. Beast in Battle to be Named Fastest Mammal Alive
(2003-12-22, QED)

Canadian Grand Prix Reinstated As Soap Box Derby
(2003-09-01, QED)

Relocation of Kobe Bryant Trial to Toronto Expected to Revitalize SARS-Stricken Economy
(2003-08-04, QED)

Blockbuster Deal Sends Beckham To Jerusalem United
(2003-07-07, QED)

Pope Considers Retirement After Hall of Fame Career
(2003-05-26, QED)

Yankee Pitcher Wells Suspended For Cliché-Abuse
(2003-05-12, QED)

Deceased Actor Jeter Upstaged Again By Yankee Shortstop
(2003-04-28, QED)

Expos Bought By Kin of Hussein, Qaddafi
(2003-04-28, QED)

» top

Business & Technology

Lego vs. Mega Bloks: No More Fun and Games
(2004-05-10, QED)

Inside CIBC's New Ethics Hotline
(2004-01-05, QED)

Nike Signs Liberian President "Chuck" Taylor to Lucrative Endorsement Deal
(2003-07-21, QED)

Ontario Court Solemnizes Corporate Mergers
(2003-06-23, QED)

Tim Hortons to Rebrand as “T-Ho”
(2003-04-28, AMFM)

TTC to Run “Our Employees Write” Ads
(2003-06-23, AMFM)

Retailers to Stop Accepting $20 Bills
(2003-08-04, AMFM)

33% of Cell Phone Users Admit to Pretending to Talk On Phone
(2003-09-29, AMFM)

Microsoft Releases Absolute Last Security Patch
(2003-11-10, AMFM)

SP Auto Pages Feb. 2, 2004
(2004-02-02, AMFM)

SP Auto Pages Mar. 1, 2004
(2004-03-01, AMFM)

Bagel, Netsky Worms Take Down Martian Rovers
(2004-03-15, WB)

» top

Lifestyle & Miscellaneous

The Satiric Press Guide to Computer Virus Detection and Prevention
(2004-05-10, QED)

The Return of the Caption Writing Contest
(2004-03-29, QED)

Caption Writing Contest
(2004-01-19, QED)

Quick Hits, Vol. 4
(2003-12-08, QED)

Quick Hits, Vol. 3
(2003-11-24, QED)

Quick Hits, Vol. 2
(2003-11-10, QED)

Quick Hits, Vol. 1
(2003-10-13, QED)

Fraudulent Journalist Glass Hired by Rolling Stone to Write about Canada
(2003-08-04, QED)

29-Year-Olds Opting for Twenty-tenth Birthdays as Way of Extending Youth
(2003-10-13, AMFM)

Growing Segment Resists Return to Standard Time
(2003-10-27, AMFM)

Top Executives Agree to Stop Laughing at Pathetic Lottery Payouts
(2003-12-08, AMFM)

Scientific Study Confirms "It Could Be Worse"
(2003-03-29, AMFM)

» top

Editorials

Mea Culpa: Satiric Press Columnist Apologizes for "Wardrobe Malfunction"
(2004-02-16, QED)

Chariots of Ice: A Cautionary Tale by QED
(2004-01-19, QED)

Requiem for an Air Miles Junkie
(2003-10-13, QED)

Fact-Writing Scandal Rocks Satiric Press
(2003-05-26, QED)

Letter to the Editor: Solomon Grundy and Alphonso Gagliano: Separated at Birth?
(2004-04-26, The Ultra-Humanite)

» top


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